i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
