At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
You took a bar mat shot.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
