Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
false alarm. still invincible.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Randomize
