So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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