I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
