We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
