So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize