mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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