I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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