how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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