i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
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