C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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