If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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