If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
