I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
