is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Randomize
