the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
