do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
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