i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
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