okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Randomize
