remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
