PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I'm both gender and math confused
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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