My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
