You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Randomize
