just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Randomize
