Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
