And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
