Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I looked at my own cervix.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
