Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
