so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
