living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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