just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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