i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
