i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
they need to just BURY HIM!
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
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