Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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