Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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