We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
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