What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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