summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
