The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Randomize
