Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
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