I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
