Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
