whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
After last night, I could never be a politician.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
