I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
