You were right. It hurts to walk today.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
