Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
