I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize