he wants to bone in the snuggie
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
