He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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